Sudbury Never Sounded So Sexy
by HalcyonHermit
Summary: Canada, Prussia and China are just a little out of sorts. This doesn't stop them from talking shop and planning a whole new frontier, to Space and Beyond (Matt's bedroom doors).


Hetalia: Axis Powers is entirely the creation and work of Hidekaz Himaruya.

~~~~~~~Ve~~~~~~

"Okay, like, why?"

Matthew had to blink a few times just to get his focus back, he was just a little too drunk for this sort of conversation, no, no. He was too inebriated, when he got drunk he started riots. Just look to Vancouver or the last time the G20 were in town. Maybe that was why Molson merged with Coors, his brother was trying to keep him in check, cheque, czech? Maybe it was time for a nice Czech style pilsner.

"I'm inebriated." Matt said, toying with the word aloud and listening for a slur.

"Dude, you're drunk." Gilbert accused, reclining on the chaise and puffing away at that one export of British Columbia that made some people a little excited, no, not Softwood.

"If I can say inebriated aloud I'm just inebriated and not drunk." Matt argued.

"Aru, he has a point." Yao said in the defence of the young nation he was having very amorous trade negations with, much to the former country's irritation.

"Don't enable him China, you haven't seen Canada drunk." Gilbert, Prussia, chastised.

"I'm just enjoying my _cold tea_, you're the one self medicating." Yao said with a lazy smile.

"I'm just saying maybe I should talk to my boss about getting a real space program going on..." Matt, Canada, said as if trying to get the conversation back to where it had been.

"Why?" Gilbert asked once more.

"Okay, like, dude...have you ever seen Sudbury?" Matt asked.

"Yes." Yao hastily replied.

"Where's Sudbury?" Gilbert asked, hoping against hope it didn't fall into those 'Vital Regions' that belonged to him and him alone.

"Ya know like, when Al gets all paranoid and starts wondering if he even landed on the moon?" Matt asked.

Gilbert realized he'd need one more toke before he could even join in on a conversation about how paranoid Alfred, Aka America Fucking Jones, could get. People had moon rocks, from the moon, they had mirrors they could shoot lasers at! Lasers...on sharks, how awesome would that be? Blinking a few times to try and get back to his point, Gilbert stared at Matt and Yao wondering just what the hell they were talking about.

"Where's Sudbury?" Gilbert asked, having the strangest sense of deja vu and shivering at it.

"Ontario, it's great for mining because some asteroid fucked it up back even before Yao was alive." Matt shrugged off, anything pre-Yao was ancient history.

"True say." Yao backed up, he had history only he knew about up until it was 'rediscovered' by archaeologists (try and remember every bit of your childhood, that shut up most nations except for the cocky ones like America).

"So you want to..." Gilbert asked, having a harsh cough that interrupted him.

"Go right to the horses mouth." Matt reiterated.

"So you need a space program, one that wasn't just following your bro around?" Gilbert asked.

Needling was one thing Prussia was good at, and he'd just said the right words for his best bud to steal his crushed _bud_ for a long toke. A few coughs later and a long swig of his beer, Matt seemed ready to carry on the discussion they were having.

"Canada Arm, nuff said. How many German Rocket Scientists did he nab anyways to do...all that?" Matt spat, even thinking the words had Gilbert giggling.

There was a loud noise and the sound of beer bottles rolling around, but one look to Ludwig said he was drunk and not just inebriated (Germany of course had his picture next to the phrase 'Attention to Detail' which was the only way anyone became a Rocket Scientist as opposed to the rest of humanity who generally just liked watching stuff blow up).

"Aru." It was all Yao had to say on the matter, he had a space program, he could emphasis with the young nation who was cracking open another beer on his quest to become drunk enough for a suitable drunk dial of his boss to explain to the whole idea.

"Okay, so you want to go up out there and mine asteroids, instead of tearing apart some part of Ontario, some part of...Canada?" Gilbert asked, toying with the concept.

"Exactly." Matt beamed.

"What about the Tar Sands?" Gilbert asked.

It was right around the time of the pout and well after the tears that he knew he wouldn't be betting any tonight. Not unless he did a really good job soothing the whimpering nation that was crying and feeling a streak of self loathing that only too much to drink, too much to smoke, and a world wide demand for oil did to a country.

Foot in Mouth achieved, it was a good thing Gilbert already had dibs on the pull out otherwise he'd be sleeping on the sofa. Switching to beer and watching China console Canada, what was it about the boy hooking up with all the cuties that had once been or were courted by Russia? Gilbert didn't begrudge the relationship Matt and Katya had, Canada and Ukraine had roots, but China just made him jealous.

"So...threesome?" Gilbert mouthed to Yao.

The onetime Empire come Superpower was already ahead of the curve as he lead the crying Matt off to the bedroom. Gilbert followed along, eager to apologize for ruining the mood earlier and help his 'Birdie' fly to the stars if only for tonight.


End file.
